"William Ziegler escaped this mortal realm on Friday, July 29, 2016, at the age of 69," the obit begins. "We think he did it on purpose to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election."
It details occupations that Ziegler held during his life, including the time when he forged his father's signature to join the Navy to serve in Vietnam and 25 years as a fireman.
"William volunteered for service in the United States Navy at the ripe old age of 17 and immediately realized he didn't much enjoy being bossed around. He only stuck it out for one war ... Upon his return to the city of New Orleans in 1971, thinking it best to keep an eye on him, government officials hired William as a fireman. After 25 years, he suddenly realized that running away from burning buildings made more sense than running toward them. He promptly retired."
Other highlights of the obit include references to Ziegler's love for "potted meats," his "alcoholic dog" and the "morons" with whom he worked.
"It was a combined effort," said Ziegler's daughter, Sharah Currier, of the obit. "My brothers, my sister and myself batted it around for a couple (of) weeks before we posted it."
Instead of holding a service, the family asked that well wishers "write a note of farewell on a Schaefer Light beer can and drink it in his honor."
Ziegler is said to have loved "tasteless internet jokes" and odd obituaries.
"He would have loved this," said Currier. "He probably would have forwarded this obituary to us."
The obit ends with another joke and a sincere note: "Unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends. He assures us that he is gone. He will be greatly missed."